Guess What Time It Is?

Jamaica has a longstanding reputation for its ganja, marijuana of international top quality. In fact, Jamaica is a country with a traditional use of cannabis, dating back some 150 years. Jamaica's traditional cannabis use took on mythical proportions in the course of the 1970s, not lastly due to the emergence of Bob Marley. This reggae singer from the ghettos of Jamaica's capital, Kingston, was the first Third World artist, who achieved world-wide recognition. The hippie movement of the West embraced Bob Marley and many other Rasta singers. Apart from preaching peace & love, many Jamaican artists also called for the legalisation of cannabis in their reggae songs. These artists did not only sing about ganja, many of them were also passionate smokers. Reggae artists (but not each and every single one) quite often like to light up a spliff or two during studio sessions.

Patience

I write this as I sit on a crowed street waiting for my friend to return to the car. I think that today has been one of the most beautiful days ever.

Love Me or Leave Me

I want to dedicate this blog to all of the women out there who are stuck in abusive relationships. It takes a lot for anyone who loves someone else genuinely to just get up and walk away from these types of situations, but how do we feel while we are in them? Why is it so hard for us to see the clearer picture when it is vivid to everyone else? Why does it seem like love changes the person you are and all of the things you said you would never do, you end up doing? Why is that you wake up each morning and you tell yourself you want to make it better, make a conscious effort to discuss your ideas with your partner, maybe even get a lot accomplished, only to find yourself right where you started. Now when I say abusive relationships I don't only man physically abusive; I mean verbally abusive relationships, financially abusive relationships and even sexually abusive relationships.

Anger

I think that some people naturally know how to control their anger, others have a very long way to go. Personally I am not easily perturbed or annoyed by people, it sort of takes a long time and a lot of convincing to make me mad. Lately, I have been surrounded by one individual that has a very....I mean very bad temper. I mean he lashes out at the drop of a dime, making it literally impossible for you to do anything that pisses him off or that is not to his liking without him literally verbally abusing you. If you think the person or their size matters, think again. This man will curse out people who are twice his size and age. I am getting angry just talking about it, I'm done. I have dedicated some of my time to coming up with ways to manage your anger, I dedicate this blog to my dear friend who is just as normal as the rest of us. Just a little "hot headed" Thank You.

List things that can trigger your anger

Make a list of the things that often set off your anger (for example, running late for work and getting stuck in a traffic jam, your teenager leaving not helping out around the house or a co-worker blaming you for something you didn't do). If you know ahead of time what makes you angry, you may be able to avoid these things or do something different when they happen.

Pay attention to the warning signs of anger in your body

Notice the things that happen to your body that tell you when you are getting angry (for example, a pounding heart, flushed face, sweating, tense jaw, tightness in your chest or gritting your teeth).The earlier you can recognize these warning signs of anger, the more successful you will probably be at calming yourself down before your anger gets out of control.

Find anger management techniques that work for you

There are a number of different ways of managing anger and some strategies will suit you better than others. Here's some simple ways to put an end to the vicious cycle of stress that anger can bring:

Control your thinking

When you're angry, your thinking can get exaggerated and irrational. Try replacing these kinds of thoughts with more useful, rational ones and you should find that this has an affect on the way you feel. For example, instead of telling yourself "I can't stand it, it's awful and everything's ruined," tell yourself "It's frustrating, and it's understandable that I'm upset about it, but it's not the end of the world and getting angry is not going to fix it." Psychologists call this type of thinking "self talk."

Develop a list of things to say to yourself before, during and after situations in which you may get angry. It is more helpful if these things focus on how you are managing the situation rather than what other people should be doing.

Before:

"I'll be able to handle this. It could be rough, but I have a plan."

"If I feel myself getting angry, I'll know what to do."

During:

"Stay calm, relax, and breathe easy."

"Stay calm, I'm okay, s/he's not attacking me personally."

"I can look and act calm."

After:

"I managed that well. I can do this. I'm getting better at this."

"I felt angry, but I didn't lose my cool."

Take time out

If you feel your anger getting out of control, take time out from a situation or an argument. Try stepping outside the room, or going for a walk. Before you go, remember to make a time to talk about the situation later when everyone involved has calmed down. During time out, plan how you are going to stay calm when your conversation resumes.

Use distraction

A familiar strategy for managing anger is to distract your mind from the situation that is making you angry. Try counting to ten, playing soothing music, talking to a good friend, or focusing on a simple task like polishing the car, doing the dishes, folding laundry or walking the dog.

Use relaxation techniques

Relaxation strategies can reduce the feelings of tension and stress in your body. Practice strategies such as taking long deep breaths and focusing on your breathing, or progressively working around your body and relaxing your muscles as you go.

Learn assertiveness skills

Assertiveness skills can be learnt through self-help books or by attending courses. These skills ensure that anger is channelled and expressed in clear and respectful ways. Being assertive means being clear with others about what your needs and wants are, feeling okay about asking for them, but respecting the other person's needs and concerns as well and being prepared to negotiate.

Avoid using words like "never" or "always" (for example, "You're always late!"), as these statements are usually inaccurate, make you feel as though your anger is justified, and don't leave much possibility for the problem to be solved.